Managing cultural differences: 5 benefits of reframes

Managing the cultural differences in marriage is doing the work that is required to navigate the cultural differences. This article builds on the fifth point of my article, better intercultural marriage differences: 6 tips. As I pointed out in that article, managing the differences is a better approach to dealing with cultural differences. I preferred managing to solving these cultural differences because I see them as differences to be solved rather than problems than need solving.

Reframing the cultural differences enhances the management of those cultural differences. What reframing does is that it adopts a new way of looking at the issue. This becomes the new worldview of managing the differences:

1. The first way it enhances managing cultural differences is that it instils hope that you are dealing with a situation that can be resolved. You cannot have this hope when you know that you are dealing with an impossible situation. And hope is a huge difference maker when dealing with mental health problems. And as I pointed out in my article, suffering in silence: overcome mental health stigma, this hope is grounded on scientific research. It’s not a blind hope that only aims to hype up someone.
2. The second reason is that you don’t approach this exercise in a combative manner. You don’t view the cultural differences as an enemy to be fought. Such an approach makes a huge difference in the whole process. This reminds me of a phenomenon that I experienced years ago when I was studying heavy equipment repair. When one was working in the garage dressed in an overall, the behaviour was different to when dressed smartly sitting in a classroom during theory lessons. The talk was looser and more industrial when dressed in the overall. Similarly, this reframe gives you a feeling that this is not an enemy to fight but a difference to manage.
3. The third reason I would advance is that it promotes understanding and appreciation of each other’s cultural values. In managing the differences, you give yourself a chance to see things from the perspective of your partner. This in turn makes you appreciate their culture even in situations you are not in agreement with them.
4. When you view differences as things to manage rather than problems to solve, there is a reduction in conflict in your marriage. You will be looking for ways to manage the differences rather than how not to fight. You will be working together and seek an environment that is conducive for that. In turn, this will lead to a reduction of conflict happening in your relationship. 
5. Communication can be enhanced if you view cultural differences in this reframed manner. If you have differences to manage, you will have to talk to each other about them to manage them. This communication will be enriching to both if it is done with the hope of establishing a middle ground. This will lead to you developing communication skills that are better with time. This is how communication is enhanced in this regard. This only benefits the relationship. Read more about communication here.

And speaking of benefiting the relationship, the clear benefit that the relationship experiences is that it becomes strengthened. When managing the differences, both of you are involved in this process. This gives you an opportunity to work as a team. This strengthens the relationship.

The need to persevere.

There is need to persevere when managing the cultural differences in your marriage. There will be frustrations along the way. There will be moments where you feel like you are not making any headway. And the worst feeling to have is that where you ask yourself how long this has to be the way it is before it gets better. I cannot honestly put my money on how long before it gets better. But what I can put my money on is the fact that with commitment and teamwork, life can be different.

The differences can be managed. This is your chance to work to realising that life you want for yourself in your relationship. Just as you were able to sit on that chair in full unwavering belief that that chair will hold you, manage your differences with the same belief. The belief that doesn’t test to see if this works. A belief that is assured that this does work. That your differences can be managed. That you will manage your differences.

The approach in managing cultural differences

Managing cultural differences has in this article been approached from a vantage point of reframing the cultural differences. This has led me to coming up with the 5 beneifts of reframing. However, the same five points I have outlined above can be used to manage the differences. You could in a way think of them as the steps to take in managing the differences. This is a topic that I will further explore in another article. For now, the message I want you to get from this article is that the approach you hold in managing cultural differences is as much important as the steps themselves that you will employ in managing the cultural differences.

If you need help in managing your differences, then contact me. I have not only read and studied about managing cultural differences. I live that. Echoing the words of D.T. Niles, I am a fellow “beggar telling another beggar where to find bread.” And subscribe to my newsletter to be informed whenever I post a new article.